Sigh.. These past two months has been one of my worst months ever. Honestly, September 09 is considered the worst month of my whole life... hmm 2007 June was kind of equivalent bad but As you know this month just started. I have a up coming 6 day weekend, I should be excited/happy about it but all I'm feeling now is sadness. I woke up this morning @ 7 from a txt. I guess I just stayed up a for an hr txting. I just kept thinking about what happen yesterday and its killing me (ho sum tong). I feel like such a bad daughter bringing up so much troubles for my parents and making them worry. One after another, and its non stop bad luck. D: I hate myself for being such a dumb girl. I just laid in bed and my eyes just started to water up. I felt my heart hurting, I haven't done anything bad to deserve this. This is not karma but its a chain of bad luck. I kept blaming myself for what had happen but others tell me I shouldn't blame it all on me. I felt very thankful for my sister friends and my friend to help me out. Its hard not think about it when my sister just lectured me this morning as I drove her to work. Plus she rubbed it in my face. God! I want to erase it out my brain. So yesterday.... I was suppose to hang out with a friend instead he took his time to help me with my troubles. We wasted like 2 hrs and his friends started to get mad at him cause he was suppose to pick up the dog(Peanut). I felt so bad about that... but he was cool about it. I'm just thinking...I'm a fckin complicated person. The whole day I felt so piss, sad, looked really sad and I just whined @ him so much. Smacked and punched him. Lol I was still really calm and strong about what had happen didn't break down yet. He just kept comforting me and making me laugh. It did made my day much better, took my mind off of it. At night, he brought me to Turtle Hill where you can see most of SF =) I enjoyed it a lot and he gave me a piggy back ride down like 100 steps. I didn't want to show my weakness until I woke up this morning... (-.-;) I cried while typing this and now I feel much better. My mistakes builds me up to be a stronger women, smarter and wiser person. I hate how I have to learn from my mistakes this way. Don't ever FYL. 'cause my life would always be worst than yours. FML. Time to move on.
Please, don't ask me what happen unless I tell you myself.
Ima give that bitch a early Christmas present. I swear Ima call all the G's, sister friends, my bad guy friends out to help me deliver this present.
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3 comments:
i hope you're ok diana, feel better!
Keep your head up. Life always has its' ups and downs. After a down, you'll get an up. That's the pattern : ) See you soon.
Judith, my pattern has been down, down, down, & WAY down.
Thanks guys =)
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